Expecting Better: A New Orleans mom calls for more access to info for pregnant people of all ages

By Yacob Arroyo

Donnean Bolds, a fashion designer who grew up in New Orleans East and the Lower Ninth Ward, has given birth and raised four children in New Orleans. Bolds said she was mostly left to figure things out on her own with little support throughout all of her pregnancies. She said women need more access to relevant information and birth advocates like doulas so they and their babies can be healthy and thrive.

“I think they need to have more communication and more advocacy to make sure that the expectant mother knows what to expect…,” Bolds said. “Let's talk about what's happening with the baby and what to expect. No one told me any of that.”

I interviewed Bolds about her experience exploring how mothers in and around New Orleans access resources and information around pregnancy and birth, and share that information with future generations. Here’s an excerpt from our conversation.

Yacob Arroyo: Describe growing up in New Orleans.

Donnean Bolds: I grew up in the Lower Ninth Ward. I'm not from New Orleans, originally. When we came to New Orleans [in 1974], my father was coming here to open up a dealership in New Orleans East. That was the first Ford Motor Company dealership here, Bill Watson Ford. So originally, when we came to New Orleans, we lived in New Orleans East and it was the suburbs at the time. It was a nice, really nice neighborhood. I was young, I probably was about seven years old. We grew up in a townhome.

YA: What did you learn about pregnancy and birth growing up?

DB: In my time, they didn't tell children anything about the birthing process or where babies came from. I never had the birds and bees conversation or any of that. Unfortunately–but fortunately–I was a teenage mom. When I got pregnant [at] 15 years old, I didn't even know I could get pregnant. So I hid it. Of course, nobody told me anything. None of my friends even knew anything. We were oblivious to knowing that you would get pregnant. I'm from [the] days where you went outside. When you woke up you ate breakfast and you went outside and you stayed outside until it got dark. Wasn't that much TV. Our TV went off at midnight. So it's a lot of stuff we just didn't know. Me and my friends knew nothing about getting pregnant.

YA: Once you understood that you were pregnant, was there anyone you went to in particular for advice?

DB: I didn't. I hid it from my mom until I just couldn't hide it anymore. Finally, I told my next door neighbor. She was a friend of mine at the time. She was two years older than me.Her name is Iris. She tried to help me because we just didn't know what to do. I have an aunt that's three years older than me, she kicked in, and she set up the appointment for me to go to the doctors. At the time, it was Charity Hospital. So I went there and started going. I [would] go to the clinic appointments by myself. Nobody told me anything. In my time, as a teenage mother you was kind of shunned. So it just made me be extremely protective of myself and extremely thick-skinned. When I went to the clinic appointments, they just took your blood. They didn't explain anything to me. You're sitting in this room, you're waiting on your name to be called. I don't know. You just kind of got shunned. Nobody told me anything. I didn't even know what to expect. They didn't tell me about labor pains. They didn't tell me about how your body changes when you’re pregnant. They basically just taking your blood every time you came. You took your vitals and measured, you listened to the heartbeat, but they never told me what to expect. No one ever told me about breastfeeding. No one ever told me about any of that. It was weird, now that I'm thinking about it.

YA: It seems like you lacked access to crucial information for a healthy pregnancy. What resources do you wish you had access to as a young mother?

DB: I think [expecting parents] should have more advocates. When you're dealing with a child or a teenager or even just a young woman period, I think they need to have more communication and more advocacy to make sure that the expectant mother knows what to expect besides, "Hey, you're pregnant, you're so many weeks away and so much." Let's talk about what's happening with the baby and what to expect. No one told me any of that. Now that I'm thinking about it and we're talking about it, I had my last kid at 30. I can't say that I was given much preparation then, either. It’s about you bringing a life into this world and no one even tells you to value that. This is serious. You're bringing life–a major responsibility–to this world. And I don't think that's explained enough, at least not in my community.

YA: What would you say were some of the practices and some lessons that you've learned from your [earlier] births that you brought into later births?

DB: With each pregnancy you realize that each pregnancy is different. You begin to feel more comfortable with yourself and how you deal with yourself. It's basically up to you, and your mindset has got to be really focused on having a great pregnancy and a great birth. Just got to relax.

YA: What message do you have for expecting moms?

DB: So when I'm talking to my youngest daughter now, who's pregnant, I'm just telling her to watch your body, relax and eat properly. Mental clarity is everything and as a matter of fact, you brought up the doula or midwife. I just sent my daughter a referral like “I want you to go to this midwife and let her check you out. Just to give you some options.” I think the whole midwife-doula thing is phenomenal. I wasn't fortunate enough to have that experience, but if I was to give a younger woman a recommendation, I would recommend that.

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